Tag Archives: Essay

A piece of nonfiction that focuses upon a given topic and is generally short in nature.

WordPress Breakdown

Dear readers,

         Not that long ago, someone inquired about the nature of my wordpress account.  This inquiry centered on the name of my wordpress account and exactly what it was.  A lot of the recent entries I posted here began with the phrase “Xerek Files,” and this person asked if this was the name of my account.  As I think about the situation, I can understand the confusion.  As a result, in an attempt to clarify the situation, I decided to write this particular entry.  With the phrase “Xerek Files,” it is in fact not the name of my wordpress account but instead the name of a document I use as a means of world building for a collection of stories that I have written and continue to expand upon.  In fact, this world building pertains to an entire fictional universe that I have created known as the Fifth Estate.

          The aim of this wordpress account is to allow me to get my writing out to the world.  Found within these digital pages are a number of different stories and essays.  These cover a wide range of topics and subject matters ranging from religious/supernatural fiction to personal opinions and thoughts on certain issues and topics.  With the longer pieces, those that are typically divided up into chapters, they are posted one chapter at a time.

          The first series of entries belong to my novella SamaelSamael is a work of religious/supernatural fiction and is my retelling of the Fall of Lucifer.  In this retelling, I essentially say that it was not out of pride, but a broken heart, that led Lucifer to rebel against God.  With the telling of the story, I don’t remember having any real plan or objective with its construction beyond that of retelling the story.  I didn’t have any specific word count or other measure of story length that I was aiming to achieve.  It was nothing more than a story that I wanted to tell.  And in the telling of Samael, I referred to other elements found within the Abrahamic religions.  These included the Archangels Michael and Gabriel, Cain, Adam’s first wife Lilith, Adam and Eve, Job, the Forbidden Fruit, the Garden of Eden, the Serpent, and the use of Satan as a title.  I plan on eventually writing a sequel to this story, taking the form of a full length novel.  In this novel, Lucifer, Cain, and possibly Lilith, will make an appearance in the narrative as well as including Judas in the story.  In the same spirit of retelling a well known narrative, I plan on putting my own spin surrounding the story surrounding Judas.

          Some time after posting this story, I posted my first full length novel, An Enemy WithinAn Enemy Within is a superhero piece where the superpowers in question aren’t as super as what we have come to expect from the genre.  The approach I used in this story is that, if superpowers really existed, how would they work?  As a result, a fair number of powers were dropped, never to be seen again.  With the powers that do exist, they can be seen as the weaker, distant cousins of the superpowers that we are all familiar with.  The story itself follows a woman by the name of Shannon who is a socially minded youth who fights for mutant rights, leading her to join the New World Power.  However, when she first joins the New World Power, she doesn’t fully understand the aim and nature of the organization.  When she does realize what the New World Power is about, it leads to tensions to arise, not only in Shannon, but between her and the New World Power itself.  And it is through this tension that the story is told.  An Enemy Within also acts as the first main story within the universe of the Fifth Estate.

          With the Fifth Estate, it is the larger universe in which An Enemy Within, as well as a number of different stories, takes place.  With the origin of the Fifth Estate name, it comes from the Estate of the Realms, first introduced in medieval France.  With the Estate of the Realms, it consists of three estates which are as follows; the First Estate consists of the clergy, the Second Estate consists of the nobility, and the Third Estate consists of the commoner.  Reinterpreting and expanding upon this concept, I created the Social Estates.  With the Social Estates, the First Estate consists of the clergy, the Second Estate consists of people of prominence, the Third Estate consists of the working class, the Fourth Estate consists of the media, and the Fifth Estate consists of misfits and outcasts.  It is within the Fifth Estate that those who are seen as possessing superpowers are typically found.

          The reason why I posted An Enemy Within here on wordpress is because I lost the flash drive that the story was stored on due to me being attacked.  This attack centered on the fact that a random stranger wanted my laptop and I refused to hand it over.  As a result, he threatened my life followed by grabbing me in an attempt to physically steal my computer.  During the scuffle, though I was able to hold on to my laptop, the very laptop that I used to write this entry, my flash drive broke free of its lanyard and vanished.  Concerned that my attacker took it, accompanied by the fact that no book agent responded to my queries about the manuscript, I decided to post it online as a means of establishing some form of copy right on the material.

          Besides An Enemy Within, other Fifth Estate stories and elements are found within this wordpress account.  These stories include Seeing the Light, The Boy From Upstate, LAX Massacre, National Registration and Regulation Act of Individuals with Gifted or Extraordinary Abilities, a rough Fifth Estate Timeline, and The Xerek FilesSeeing the Light is a novelette that follows a young boy who possesses a mutant ability that appears to others as if he has turned into a human torch.  As a result of this, it causes family tensions and eventually leads him to a faith healer, an experience that emotionally scars the young boy.  With The Boy From Upstate, it deals with people who are mutants but don’t possess any superpowers.  All that they possess are odd physical characteristics and nothing more.  As a result of this, it leads to a hate crime to be committed against one of these individuals, resulting in the individual’s death.  With LAX Massacre, it takes place not that long after the 9/11attacks and centers around an attack on LAX itself.  With National Registration and Regulation Act of Individuals with Gifted or Extraordinary Abilities, it came out of the Mutant Registration Act that has been mentioned within the Marvel Universe.  Because the Mutant Registration Act was only mentioned within the comics and never really addressed directly, I decided to actually flush out and write an actual bill that is being discussed in front of Congress with the aim of regulating those with superpowers.  The Fifth Estate timeline is meant to give a rough guideline of some world events to help give the audience an idea of when the events of a particular story of the Fifth Estate took place.  Finally, with The Xerek Files, they are notes and entries found within the journal of a geneticist who is specializing in individuals who possess superpowers.

          Finally, there are some random entries and essays found within this wordpress account.  Three of these essays pertain to misanthropy and the others are essentially just random entries.  Of these random entries, they consist of me seeing a UFO, depression, Attributes of a Monster, and the difference between robots, cyborgs, and androids, just to name a few.  There is even a reposting of someone else’s post regarding scale of different things in the universe, ranging from DNA strands all the way up through galaxies.  So it is here that I shall come to an end.  I hope that this has helped clarify the situation and the aim of this wordpress account.  And keep reading, regardless of the story or author involved.

Bradley P. Thomas

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Posted by on June 26, 2013 in Uncategorized



The Pain of Depression

Human beings are an emotional species. Love, hate, anger, sadness; these are just some of the emotions that we are capable of experiencing. One such emotion, and what this entry is going to be about, is depression. Depression is an emotional state of extreme sadness that typically saps the light, happiness, and joy a person can experience in their lives. It can become so bad that the individual can actually feel pain because of it. This pain is not a physical one, but an emotional one. But because of how the brain is wired, it doesn’t distinguish between the two. Pain is pain and the brain doesn’t care about what form it takes. And like physical pain, emotional pain can become so bad that the only relief that a person can see to relieve it is through death, typically done through suicide. But even though they see death as the only way of obtaining any kind of relief, they don’t want to die. All that they want is for the pain to stop, that’s all.

With depression, it blinds the sufferer to the world around them, preventing them from seeing the good things that they have in their life. In addition to this, it prevents them from obtaining any kind of enjoyment out of life that just might exist for them. They also feel like they can’t be helped out of the pit that they find themselves in. The only way that they can escape the pain, as stated earlier, is to enter the waiting arms of death. Depression causes this to be the only answer that they see as being readily available for them to use, and thus, the only way out of the situation that they find themselves in. Depression is an all consuming beast that just doesn’t care about the sufferer or those who are in that person’s life.

As a result of this, I see depression as an emotional cancer. With cancer, it is essentially the person’s body turn cannibalistic. The cells of the person’s body divide and spread uncontrollably, impairing function and preventing the body from operating properly. Depression is no different. But in the case of depression, instead of the person’s cells consuming the individual alive, it is their emotional state that is eating them from the inside out. And it is beyond the person’s control. They can’t help it.

With cancer, people can and do die because of it. Some people fight it while others accept it. With those who accept it, it can occur when they first learn of the diagnosis while others accept it after fighting it for as long as they can. However, there are some who fight it all the way. But they are not held morally responsible for what happens to them. However, we do hold those who commit suicide morally responsible for what they do. This may be because suicide victims actively take their own life whereas cancer victims are typically subject to something that is beyond their control. But it’s important to note that depression is a medical condition that is beyond the person’s ability to control. This can be due to factors in the person’s environment, social life, or is a part of a chemical imbalance within their system. The person can be socially isolated from others, experience pressures that they can’t handle, are socially awkward, have some kind of identity crisis, or was physically or sexually assaulted for whatever reason. It can even be a combination of these factors that play into the person’s condition.

But regardless of the reason, it rests beyond the person’s control. They shouldn’t be blamed for their condition or the fallout that results from it. And some of them do seek help and are able to be treated for their depression while others seek help but still follow through on taking their own life. The factors that are in play into this can be quite numerous and be quite complicated. Depression is also a highly individualistic emotional state for it is literally tailored to fit that particular person. As a result, their medical treatment, like any type of medical treatment, needs to be tailored to that particular person. Basic tools and stepping stones act as the groundwork for this treatment, but from there, need to be customized and fit that person’s needs. Emotional injuries and traumas should be treated like any physical injury or trauma. The only difference between emotional and physical traumas is that emotional traumas aren’t visible and readily identifiable whereas physical traumas are. But a part of our physical being is the emotional element that resides in all of us.

And like any physical injury, if a person’s emotional conditions go untreated, it can lead to infection and the wounds will fester. The body has the potential of fighting these things off, but it can take a lot out of the person and can leave a nasty scar behind. However, there are limits to what the body can do and it can’t always fight off every threat it faces, resulting in the death of the individual. With emotional injuries, it can lead to the inevitable result of suicide. People suffering from depression don’t want to experience the pain that accompanies depression. Yes, it’s normal to experience sadness, even great sadness, but it becomes unhealthy and dangerous if it goes on for too long, especially if it goes untreated. But depression can’t be helped. Thus, those who suffer from depression shouldn’t be ostracized because of it and those who commit suicide shouldn’t be condemned. It’s not their fault.

With suicide, there are more people affected then just the person who commits this act. There are friends and family who are left behind who have to deal with the emotional fallout of the situation. They are left wondering what they could have done in order to save the person as well as ask themselves why they didn’t see the signs that the person was going to commit suicide. They can also be left angry and embittered by the situation for they don’t have a way of dealing or resolving it. They are just stuck in the situation with no way of getting out of the predicament they find themselves in. They also need someone or something to blame, and since the person who committed suicide is the only person that is readily available for them to latch on to and lash out at, the victim of suicide becomes the target of this anger and blame. As a result of this, it has become a social taboo in the Western World to commit suicide. This taboo has become so ingrained within Western culture that it has found its way into the holy books of the three Abrahamic religions, thus creating a religious taboo against this act as well.

A result of this is that a lot of ideas and attitudes surrounding suicide have formed. One such idea describes suicide as a permanent solution to a temporary problem. But for those who suffer from depression, have considered suicide, or have attempted or have successfully committed it don’t feel that their condition is temporary. For them, it is quite permanent. As a result, it can require them to receive a lifetimes worth of treatment without it even being fully cured. And those who suffer from depression can engage in acts of self-harm, something that can take on a number of different forms. These can include engaging in physical harm and injury with suicide being on one extreme of the spectrum, becoming socially isolated or withdrawn from others, beating themselves up emotionally, wondering what they could have done in situations where they were hurt in one form or another, fixating on events or situations that are beyond their control, or turning to comfort activities like eating to help fill the void they are feeling.

In addition to this depression, these individuals can feel like their emotional state is their burden to bear and theirs alone. This can be due to the fact that they see it as being unfair to burden others with their pain. As a result, it can cause them to feel that they are all alone, which in turn only exacerbates the situation. They can even appear to be alright on the outside without a care or worry in the world. This can be due to the fact that they just want to turn and hide, not wanting others to feel bad for them or to cause others to suffer because of them. But this doesn’t erase the fact that they can be hurting inside and just burying the pain that they are feeling.

In the end, those suffering from depression or have considered, attempted, or succeeded at committing suicide shouldn’t be the subject of moral judgment. They are victims of something that they can’t help or otherwise control and are suffering because of it. What these people need is help, not ridicule. Like any living thing, they have a sense of self-preservation that causes them to want to live. However, the pain that they are experiencing can override this sense of self-preservation, causing them to seek an end to the pain that they have to endure, something that is typically done through the means of suicide. Suicide, like gangrene, is nothing more than a symptom of something much greater and deeper then what is readily seen and needs to be treated like any physical medical condition. If not, a lot of needless suffering will occur because of it and a lot of people will needlessly die as a result of this.


Posted by on April 28, 2013 in Uncategorized


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Tales of the Extraordinary (Description)

Within the universe of the “Fifth Estate,” there are a series of stories that deal with individuals with superpowers and the superhero genre but take on a more fantastical point-of-view.  They take the form of a variety of different media and can have individuals from the larger universe from which it belongs such as Crow and T-Bone as well as organizations such as the New World Power appear within its pages.  These collections of stories are known as Tales of the Extraordinary and they resemble those found in real world comic books.  The only difference that they possess is that they are stories within a story.


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Bionics and Robotics

Technology is an incredible thing and has existed alongside humanity ever since we learned the effective use of rocks and sticks to achieve a particular end.  We’ve been using technology even before modern man has existed, tracing its use back millions of years to our earliest ancestors.  And humanity is, if not the masters of technology, than an animal that is just most adept at creating and using it.  Recently, we’ve reached the point where we are able to create self-operating machines as well as merge organic components with mechanical elements.  This is what this entry is all about.

What inspired me to write this post was a Star Wars special that I saw years ago.  At first, it was initially only going to consist of bionics and androids, but after some consideration, I realized that I couldn’t talk about either one of these without talking about robots and cyborgs as well.  This is due to the fact that all four of these categories are interconnected and overlap with each other.  So here we go.

Bionics: A bionic is any organic being that has been either enhanced by or at least has parts replaced with a synthetic material.  What this essentially entails is that any person who has a body part replaced with something created by science to function similar to the original, replaced, part is a bionic.  This artificial replacement can range from the insertion of an artificial pace-maker to the use of an artificial limb.  In the realm of science fiction, this is taken to the extreme with total body reconstruction.  Two of the most famous examples of bionics are Darth Vader and the Six Million Dollar Man.  Both Vader and Steve Austin are both human beings that required major surgery to replace missing and damaged tissue and organs with mechanical replacements.  And despite their major surgeries and tissue replacements, they still constitute human beings.  This is due to the fact that, despite the amount of synthetic replacements that they received, their core being is still that of a human being.  And if the core being of a creature remains that of an organic creature, they are considered a bionic.

Robots: A robot is an artificial being that requires external information and input for it to function and operate properly.  It is totally reliant upon outside information for it to operate.  It is used by humanity to enter and explore an environment that is unsafe for them to enter or which the person is unable to reach on their own.  Examples of this include defusing a bomb or exploring the surface of Mars.  They are also used as a labor saving device when the situation calls for it.  One such example is on an assembly line, allowing the process to become more effective and allow the company to make more of a given product in a given amount of time.

Androids: An android is an artificial being that is able to operate on its own without instructions or input from an outside source.  It receives its instructions and commands from itself based upon its own desires and wishes, so to speak, though they can receive instruction from others if they so wish.  Everything that it needs to operate is located within its microchips and motherboard.  In this way, it is an autonomous being, though it possessing self-awareness is something that is yet to be determined.  Essentially, it is an advanced version of a robot.  The size and shape of the android is irrelevant, as long as it is self-reliant.  Examples of androids are R2-D2 and C-3PO from Star Wars and Data from Star Trek.  All three examples possess sufficient software to operate on their own.  It’s also important to note that all three possess artificial intelligence.  This allows them to better interact with their surroundings because it allows them to reason and learn.  Artificial intelligence, however, is not absolutely necessary for an android to be able to function and operate properly.  It’s just an attribute that we generally associate with them because it allows us to better relate to them as an audience.

Cyborg: The word cyborg stands for cybernetic organism and it is a synthetic being that possesses at least some organic material.  Essentially, it is nothing more than an android with flesh.  The amount of flesh it possesses, and where it is located, is irrelevant, as long as the underlying structure is mechanical.  In the real world, we are yet to develop what I have just described.  In the realm of science fiction, however, is another story.  Cyborgs have already appeared in several science fiction stories.  Two such examples are the Terminator and RoboCop.  With the Terminator, it is nothing more than an exoskeleton android that is surrounded by living human tissue.  This living human tissue is designed to disguise the true identity and nature of the Terminator.  And as long as the Terminator possesses this tissue, it’s still classified as a cyborg.  However, as soon as it loses its tissue, it becomes classified as an android.  RoboCop on the other hand can be a little tricky.  RoboCop was created from the corpse of Alex Murphy, and since OCP started off with the body of Murphy, it could be argued that RoboCop could be classified as a bionic.  But for a person to be classified as a bionic, he or she needs to be alive when the implants are put into place.  The use of Murphy’s body after he died was just a formality.  This is due to the fact that for the RoboCop project to work, OCP needed the training and experience Murphy acquired over the years of being a cop.  In all tense and purposes, RoboCop is nothing more than a machine that just so happens to possess a human brain and some other organs to allow the brain to function.  The only reason why people would call RoboCop a bionic is because OCP put a human brain into one of its machines.  But just because a human brain could be found within the metal skull of RoboCop doesn’t qualify him as a bionic, though a moral debate can arise surrounding his humanity, which was addressed in RoboCop one and two.  For a person to be considered a bionic, synthetics need to be added to the human body, not the other way around.


Posted by on October 29, 2011 in Sci-Fi Tech


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Seeing a UFO

UFO’s have become a fixture of modern American culture.  It has become so popular and widespread that it has become the label of an entire community.  This community believes that extraterrestrials are visiting Earth.  From my perspective, whenever the phrase UFO is used, it pertains to people who have seen something strange in the sky and aren’t able to identify it and then become believers in alien visitations.  However, this perspective is a bit biased because whenever I come across people who tell stories about UFO’s, they are also believers in aliens.

But to be honest, I once saw a UFO myself.  I saw it when I was still living in the house I grew up in.  I can’t remember exactly why, but I was out walking down my street when I saw it. As I was making my way down the street, I got a glimpse of something in the sky before it went behind a house.  Since I only got a glimpse of the object, I wasn’t able to immediately identify what it was.  However, after some time had gone by, accompanied by some critical thinking, I was able to conclude that what I saw was the tail section of a private plane that was flying in the area. What helped me reach this conclusion was the fact that I noticed other private planes flying around before I saw it.

It’s important to note what I mean by UFO.  What UFO stands for is “Unidentified Flying Object.”  If you see something moving in the sky that you cannot identify, then it is a UFO.  This is the basic meaning of the phrase.  And when I use the phrase UFO here in this essay, as well as generally, I’m using it in this basic meaning: it’s an Unidentified Flying Object. However, when other people use the phrase, UFO stands for a visiting alien spacecraft.  But that’s not what it means.  It’s a flying object that you cannot identify.  That’s it, and nothing more.  It’s important not to read anything more into it than that.  But because humanity is a pattern seeking creature, we want to give greater meaning to things then they really deserve.

What inspired me to write this entry was because I saw two red dots flying in the night sky last night while I was sitting in the hot tub at my current residence.  As I was sitting there, staring at them, I was interested.  But after about a seconds thought, I realized that they were nothing more than private planes of terrestrial origin.  I noticed a lot of private planes, as well as a few helicopters, flying around the area, so I was able to quickly conclude that those little red dots must have been private planes.  And what allowed me to reach such a conclusion so quickly was the fact that I had a continuing, uninterrupted view of the objects.  And once I figured out what the objects were, I no longer cared what they were because I was able to figure them out.

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Posted by on October 3, 2011 in Uncategorized


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Powered Armor v. Mechs

Powered Armor and Mechs are both pieces of technology that are found in science fiction and anime stories.  Both of these pieces of technology have real world applications, but how I see it, it is the former that has the greatest real world applications.  From the research that I have done, cursory though it might me, the distinction between the two isn’t clear.  For those who know of Powered Armor and Mechs, they are aware of the differences between the two, but I’m not aware of anyone who clearly defined either one.  If someone has already defined the differences between Powered Armor and Mechs, I’m unaware of it and it won’t stop me from giving my view on the situation.  So we go.

Powered Armor: Powered Armor is a personalized suit of armor that is designed to completely protect the user while he or she is in a high conflict situation.  Similar to other forms ofpersonalized armor, it is designed to prevent the user from becoming injured or killed while under attack.  But unlike traditional forms of armor, Powered Armor completely encases the operator in armor with little to no gaps in protection and is reliant upon pistons, servos, and electronics in order to move and operate while at the same time lacking the cumbersomeness of traditional types of personalized armor would put on the user and allows for the freedom for motion that is similar to that of an ordinary human being that not found in other types of armor.  Due to the shape of the operator, Powered Armor is anthropomorphic in appearance with the operator located within the chest and leg cavity of the armor.  In addition to this, Powered Armor possesses a set of arms, allowing the operator to manipulate his or her surrounding environment as well as to operate weaponry that is specially designed for Powered Armor.

In addition to this, Powered Armor possesses sensory equipment that allows the operator to interact with his or her surrounding environment as it changes.  This sensory equipment consists primarily of microphones and video receivers, which is located primarily in the head of the suit, though there are secondary sensors located elsewhere in the suit to act as backup sensors during situations where the primary sensors have become damaged, destroyed, or otherwise disabled.  The video images that are received by the cameras are displayed on either the interior surface of the suit in front of the operator or onto micro-screens located just over each eye of the operator.  In addition to this, the Powered Armor is equipped with radio communication capability so that the operator can communicate with other units or with command easily.

There are two basic layouts for Powered Armor.  The first layout has the operator’s arms located within the chest cavity of the unit with the controls for the mechanical arms easily accessible to the operator.  The second layout has the operator’s arms located within the arms of the unit themselves, allowing the arms to move in sync with the arm movements of the operator.  But regardless of the layout, the legs of the operator are located within the legs of the suit.

The initial use for Powered Armor will be by the military to aid and protect the infantry.  But as time goes by, new and different applications for Powered Armor will be implemented.  Lighter and quicker units will be developed to be used by shock troops and aquatic versions will be developed for amphibious assaults and aquatic warfare.  Eventually, this technology will have civilian applications, found primarily with law enforcement agencies.  The first such uses will be with SWAT followed by crowd control and border patrols.

Mechs: Mechs are the larger cousins of Powered Armor.  What makes Mechs different from Powered Armor is sheer size.  Due to the increased size of the Mech, the operator is located within a centralized cockpit, similar in nature to a jet.  And because of its size and complexity, the operator is prevented from controlling the Mech through direct bodily motion.  Thus, the operator relies upon the Mechs instrumentation to control it.  In addition to all of the necessary instrumentation, the operator also has a viewing screen or window, allowing the operator to view his or her surrounding environment.

With the basic layout of the Mech, it consists of the aforementioned cockpit accompanied by an anthropomorphic means of transportation; that is, legs.  Because it relies upon legs to move from one location to another, its center of gravity is constantly shifting.  This shouldn’t be much of a problem for a Mech that consists of three or more legs, but is a problem when dealing with a bipedal Mech.  With a bipedal Mech, it is forced to transfer its entire weight from one leg to another while walking, making it prone to falling over.  To counteract this problem, sensors and other necessary equipment have been installed to help counteract the Mech’s desire to fall over.  Once this hurdle is overcome, it should be onward and upward.

As stated before, the basic layout of the Mech consists of a cockpit and legs.  From there, any necessary accessories will be added to the Mech, depending upon the intended mission for it.  If it’s going to be a scout, than it will receive all the necessary sensory equipment for it to gather as much information as it can about the environment or the enemy.  However, it will not receive any type of weaponry.  But if it’s going to be used in an offensive capability, which people generally think of when Mech comes to mind, than the Mech will receive whatever weaponry and related equipment it will need to perform its task.

Because of the basic design of Mechs, it will not expand beyond that of a cockpit and legs.  It will not be given a torso and arms because they would be useless additions accompanied by the fact that they will make the Mech needlessly complex.  With the use of Mechs, their primary use will be in uneven terrain, such as mountains and jungles.  This is due to the fact that tanks already satisfy the same basic role in open terrain situations.  However, there is the potential for them to be used in urban military situations.  They will also remain a purely military piece of equipment because there is little civilian use for them accompanied by the fact that Mechs have a high damage potential to them.

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Posted by on August 25, 2011 in Sci-Fi Tech


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Another Fucking Driver

Drivers need to watch where the fuck they are going and what they are doing.  I don’t know if this is a L.A. thing or is a nationwide phenomenon found in every city across the country and I’m only aware of this because I live in L.A., but drivers need to pay attention to what the fuck they are doing.  I bring this up because I was almost hit by a driver the other day while I was walking home from work.  And this isn’t the first time either.  It happened before, and again, I’m commenting on this situation.

The first time that I wrote about this subject was in “A Pedestrians Right of Way” where I commented upon almost exactly the same thing.  What happened this time was that I was walking home from being dropped off at the bus stop and this asshole cut right in front of me while I was crossing the street.  I can’t imagine that he didn’t see me, but he just decided not to stop.  While I was crossing the street, I had my iPhone out and I was putting something down on the notepad app relating to my second manuscript, though I would look up once in awhile to make sure that I didn’t run into anyone or thing.  It could be said that I had my face buried in my phone, but that doesn’t justify the driver’s actions.

And it was when I was typing a note when I became aware of the situation as it was happening.  I was in the intersection and something in the corner of my eye caught my attention.  What caught my attention was a car that was closer to me then it would normally be if it was just driving along Venice.  Noticing it, I turned my head to take a look at what the situation was, and that was then the driver cut me off.    When this fuckup cut in front of me, he couldn’t have been more than a foot in front of me.  From what I recall, I didn’t break stride, but I wasn’t focusing on my gait at the time when this situation occurred.

After he cut me off, I watched this shit drive off.  And about 20 to 25 feet from where I was was a stop sign, where he stopped.  He stopped for a stop sign but he didn’t stop for me to safely finish crossing the street.  Apparently, an inanimate object has a greater value for this fuck then a fellow human being.  And it wasn’t the fear of the law that stopped him either.  He just didn’t want to inconvenience himself by acknowledging my presence and slow down his trip back home any more then he had to.

This is my problem with drivers.  They don’t care about anything that occurs outside of their little steal cage.  Nothing outside of their shitting little world matters.  They become disconnected with the rest of the world and anything that intrudes into their fragile little world only pisses them off and deserves whatever happens to it for having the “nerve” to interfere with their world.

But the thing is that I wasn’t pissed off about the situation, though I had a right to be so.  He put my immediate wellbeing into danger.  And like before, I probably should have called the cops, but I was just apathetic to the entire situation to do so.  And in retrospect, I doubt that the cops could have done anything about it.  That fuck off wouldn’t have even gotten a stern talking to.  Nothing would have been resolved and I probably wouldn’t have been left with a police report.  The only thing that would have happened if I called the police was the possibility of me being left pissed off.  It just wasn’t worth it.

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Posted by on August 13, 2011 in Essays of Misanthropy


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